1. Maintain external compliance with the no dating policy, but think continually about interns of the opposite sex, and talk about the opposite sex with your roommates all the time.
2. Think that curfew is for little kids. Stay up till 10 am every morning.
3. Assume that fasting is impossible. Never even try it.
4. Spend all your time studying the end-times figuring out how to win arguments.
5. Never try fellowshipping with the Holy Spirit.
6. Every time you hear a sermon on bridling your tongue, guarding your thought life, or managing your time and money, assume that it doesn't apply to you.
7. Assume that everybody is faking their prayer language, and never study what the Bible says about tongues or ask for prayer to receive the gift of tongues.
8. Never ask Stuart a question for fear of looking dumb.
9. Never pray on the mic.
10. (for musicians and singers) Don't audition for a worship team and then complain all the time about how monotonous the worship is at IHOP.
11. Leave your schedule open so you don't feel restricted when you don't have to be in the prayer room.
12. Don't take any FSM classes; sleep in every day instead.
13. Ignore the policy about video games and movies. Fill all your free time with electronic entertainment.
14. Insist on having to figure out for yourself the allegorical meanings of everything in the Song of Solomon, and never buy a book or a commentary about it.
15. Watch the clock every night in the prayer room and think about how you can't wait to get out of there.
16. Treat the whole six hours in the prayer room as study hall every night. Read lots of books but don't bother trying to intercede.
17. Complain about how narrow IHOP-KC's prayer mandates are (for Israel, Kansas City, the black community, etc.), and never ask the leadership or God to help your understand them.
18. Make fun of your core leader behind his or her back and assume that there's nothing you can learn from them.
19. Gossip about your roommates.
20. Make sure everybody thinks you're cool (or smart or spiritual or radical... or whatever).
21. Treat service assignments (cleaning, CEC, inner city, etc.) as a tedious chore beneath your dignity.
22. Assume that you are now part of the spiritual elite. Write condescending emails and newsletters to people in your home church.
23. Never use the Apostolic prayers (Ephesians 1:17-19, Ephesians 3:16-19, etc.). Always pray in your own words instead of trying to understand the prayers in the Bible.
24. Come up with theological reasons why God doesn't answer your prayers. Refuse to consider the possibility that you might be "asking amiss" (James 4:3).
25. Assume that God is not doing anything unless there are signs and wonders. Never pray for wisdom and revelation to understand the Bible.
26. Never pray for your home church, unsaved friends, or people you actually know at home.

As I've been typing this up, it struck me that I know people who have done most of these (and I've done several myself), but in the end, the internship still wasn't a waste. They showed up as one person, and they left as someone completely different.

It's not that IHOP or Fire in the Night is such a cool thing; it's the Lord. If you take a bunch of 18-30 year olds and require them to read the Bible and talk to God for 6 hours a day for 3 months - in the middle of the night, so they have nowhere else to be - even if they do it kicking and screaming, the Holy Spirit will still change their hearts!